Reacting to Rude Behavior
As a parent, you have to pick which battles to fight with your teenager and when those batters occur. While your teen may be rude in front of company or in public, you don’t need to discipline him right then and there. If you do, it will only add to the frustration you and your teen are feeling. You could also embarrass your teen to the point where he has a full-blown meltdown. What do you do at the moment that your teen is being rude to you? There are a couple of things you can try but the best one is usually to ignore it until you can be alone with your teenager. The other is to ask your teen politely to stop doing the behavior. Whichever you pick, it should be followed by a conversation with your teen.
Talking to Your Teen About Rude Behavior
When you talk to your teen after the rude behavior you’ll want to cover several points: It is not wrong here to let the behavior slide after coming to an agreement with your teen the first time the rude behavior happens. This is a personal choice that a parent has to make.
Tips to Prevent Rude Behavior
Rude behavior in teens can be prevented for the most part. Although there will always be times when your teen gets aggravated and acts rudely—mood swings and growing pains go together—talking to your teen when they are not being rude will help. Here are some tips to help you prevent rudeness before it even starts:
Use good manners yourself every day in your home. Children learn what they live. When you model good manners, you will know your teen knows what they are and will use them at least some of the time.Ask your teen what acceptable behavior they could do instead of being rude when they’re frustrated. Then, ask your teen how you can help remind them to do the acceptable behavior. Sometimes teens have the answers you’re seeking and you simply have to ask them.Set up a contract about rude behavior for the whole family to follow. Be clear about the behaviors you wish everyone to avoid and the consequences that will be enacted.Use family meetings to talk about politeness and what manners mean to you. Praise your teen for using his good manners at a specific time that week. Let him know that you appreciate when he does a good job.Know your own moods and when your behavior borders on being rude to your teen. It’s one thing to be firm, it’s quite another to take out your bad day on him because his room is a mess. Take a timeout. When your teen sees you handling your frustrations this way, he will learn this positive behavior.
